WWFB: Office Workers Will Eat Anything Abandoned In the Kitchen Edition
The scene: My client’s office in downtown Milwaukee, Wisconsin, midday, late spring.
I stumbled upon something like this in the office kitchen…something like this but bigger and more menacing. I didn’t have my phone so couldn’t capture the thing in all its terrible majesty, so this photo from Google Image Search will have to do.
It had a body, too, but most of the body had been eaten away. What remained was the head, plus a ragged stump of a torso.
Pro tip: Never choose red velvet when making an anthropomorphic cake.
It was laid out on a big foil-covered piece of cardboard, upon which the baker had written in icing: “Bob’s turning 50!”
I thought…Good God! Is that supposed to be…Bob?
It’s a big office so I have no idea who Bob is, but I’m pretty sure he doesn’t look like…that. (Surely I’d know Bob if he looked like…that.)
But then, the orange nose made me think it’s probably supposed to be a…snowman? But it’s mid-May, that just doesn’t make any sense!
But then my useless pop culture knowledge base churned into motion and after several awkward seconds of me standing in front of this thing, eyes frozen in terror, it came to me.
Olaf? Is that you, Olaf? Wh…what have they done to you? And is Bob next?
Much to my surprise, all remnants of “Olaf” disappeared within minutes.
But I was left with more questions than answers. Who is Bob? Why did somebody think an Olaf cake was an appropriate choice for a 50-year-old banker? Wouldn’t a cake depicting a monogrammed shirt or perhaps a pair of tasseled loafers be more apropos? Did his arch-nemesis bake this thing as some kind of message? If we can get to Olaf, we can get to you…Bob!
VERDICT: 9/10 for the mystery and intrigue (I didn’t try it). One point off for the choice of red velvet for a cake with a body…that’s a bridge too far.